I’ve been a little quite on the blog lately. Just haven’t felt like writing or more precisely finishing things I’ve started. It’s not that there’s been a shortage of things to do or write about. Each day typically provides at least one or two blog worthy events but I’m just not motivated enough to put them down on paper so to speak. Also, I hate to admit it but everything has been competing with mind numbing TV and far too much CNN, The Comedy Channel, ESPN, and NFL football to name a few.
It’s not like I’m doing nothing, although, at times it sure feels that way. I’ve started a cardiac rehab program three times a week and have been doing a lot of walking on my own as well. Unfortunately, there's still a lot of down time without the family around. In addition I've been told by the rehab folks to slow things down a bit and to not push things to fast.
Part of the problem is definitely body fatigue and pain which really only disappears after lying down. The pain is not excruciating by any means but there is almost always an uncomfortable feeling in my chest and back. It’s far more noticeable after walking or standing for long periods of time or after car rides. It’s difficult to describe but imagine a severe crick in your back, between and across the shoulder blades, that just won’t go away. I feel like if someone could lift up my shoulder blades and get in there like they were kneading a big pile of bread dough I would be in heaven. The word from past survivors and the rehab folks is that this could take as long as six months or more to go away. Ultimately, it’s caused by how your body is positioned on the operating table. For 3-4 hours every muscle and nerve in your chest and back are chilled and then pulled and held in positions they don’t like very much. This tends to leave a lasting impression! A little reminder of what you've just been through even though your mind is ready to move on.
So following a few emails over the past few days wondering exactly how things are going I figured I had better put something up to let everyone know that I’m doing OK. Not great by any standard of measurement primarily because I really miss my family on Saipan but, I'm hanging in there.
Then again I’m certainly not doing as well as I was when my new profile picture was taken.
But hey, that was taken at Club Med and that was life as it should be!
Now I know it’s not the first thing most of you will notice in the picture but check out those abs (on me). This is now my goal photo (with regards to my abs)! I need to loose a few pounds from where I’m at these days and realistically the only way anyone is going to look at this current gut and think "sexy" will be if I can add those six pack handles back to the canvas and distract ones eyes from the incision scar and what looks like two large bullet holes from where the chest tubes came out.
I’ve got a way to go but I don't mind looking at the picture and goals are a good thing to have when you’re trying to fight off the urge to waste the day with mindless TV.
Anyone care to guess which Club Med Village this was taken at!